I live [comparatively to most people] a fairly solitary life.\u00c2\u00a0 I live by myself in a cottage near Golden Gate Park in SF.\u00c2\u00a0 I am a video editor and usually work mostly alone – until it’s time for the client to make changes in ‘real-time’.\u00c2\u00a0 Even when not working at my cottage, I am usually editing alone in the room at the company I am working for that week [sometimes broadcast tv, sometimes corporate clients, etc].<\/p>\n
This past week I was working for a corporate client who sat in my edit suite with me for 3 days straight.\u00c2\u00a0 The client was constantly on her mobile phone talking [engaged in a conference call or merely talking to her superiors one on one], or on her laptop answering the many emails that chimed in constantly, or on a landline shouting at her assistant.\u00c2\u00a0 After 3 solid days of this going on for 8 hours a day while I tried to do my work, my mental state started to collapse.<\/p>\n
By the last day of the edit my ‘self’ was projecting stories forward and backward and was collapsing space around possibilities.\u00c2\u00a0 I ended up saying ‘no’ constantly, even before a question was asked I was already ‘married’ to the story that the change could not be executed. pg 149 LOK – “the self wants to become a certain way or attain a certain state.\u00c2\u00a0 It wants to be happy, to be in possession of something, to be finished, or simply to endure.” <\/strong><\/p>\n Though I found myself completely unable to shift my mood or alter the stories that my ‘self’ was spinning and marrying, I did NOTICE the activity I was engaged in [and the story I was engaged to] while it was going on.\u00c2\u00a0 I took solace in the in-the-moment immediate noticing of that activity.\u00c2\u00a0 Can actual action of working my way out of that state be far behind?<\/p>\n -Diana<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I live [comparatively to most people] a fairly solitary life.\u00c2\u00a0 I live by myself in a cottage near Golden Gate Park in SF.\u00c2\u00a0 I am a video editor and usually work mostly alone – until it’s time for the client … Continue reading