{"id":961,"date":"2009-04-02T10:28:37","date_gmt":"2009-04-02T17:28:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/2009\/04\/02\/objects-of-desire-tsk-class-3-unit-1\/"},"modified":"2013-03-09T13:13:56","modified_gmt":"2013-03-09T21:13:56","slug":"objects-of-desire-tsk-class-3-unit-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/?p=961","title":{"rendered":"Objects of Desire – TSK Class 3, Unit 1"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Desire\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I wanted to observe my internal processes during different desires, and also during incidents of avoidance.\u00c2\u00a0Among other things, I observed the desire for an iPod, the hunger for lunch, the avoidance of anger and not wanting to display it, desire for employment that was really a desire for some kind of financial security or independence. I even observed the desire to move out of the present to hang out in a space of imagined possibilities, in avoidance of the present.<\/p>\n

I noticed, during a recurring desire for a ‘thing’<\/em>, the tendency is to imagine myself in possession of it, in certain attractive scenarios or stories. I saw myself enjoying it, and there were pleasing feeling tones around the story. The pleasing feelings seemed to feed into a space that felt sort of lacking, a hollow that is almost ‘itchy’<\/em> for filling in; like not wanting to be here with what is<\/em>, and hankering for something new.\u00c2\u00a0Avoiding something is very similar, but the feeling tones were different.\u00c2\u00a0They seemed to come from a desire to not<\/u> want to feel uncomfortable<\/em>, as I was immersed in an imagined story of how ‘things’<\/em> might<\/u> be.\u00c2\u00a0Hunger, on the other hand, felt very basic or direct, but then I also proceeded to projections of filling the hunger, fulfilling the expectations that sprang from it.<\/p>\n

Both desiring<\/em> and avoiding<\/em> seemed to emerge from concerns centered around my self-interest; there’s a story from the past about the good thing I want or the bad thing I want to avoid, and there’s a projection of a story in an imagined future; a space in which these stories are accepted as a possible future.\u00c2\u00a0 The underlying feeling of a restless dissatisfaction seemed to motivate my-self to use these images as a basis to identify with the object, and a way of proceeding to act toward achieving the imagined desired object<\/em> or avoiding<\/em> it. I realized I could drop the self urges and just observe this process standing partially in it, and outside it, as an observer.\u00c2\u00a0The latter seemed like a way to encompass both.<\/p>\n

I also noticed at times that it sapped my energy to want something if there was a lot of ‘process’<\/em> involved in the wanting (same with avoiding).\u00c2\u00a0So that at the end of investigating aspects around the desired thing (even though that seemed somewhat interesting), I still didn’t have it, the thing was still ‘out there<\/em>‘, and I felt disappointed, frustrated, that the whole process was circular and a waste of energy.<\/p>\n

A final point, I remember achieving something I wanted after much prior effort looking into it, it was a particular car, and I did feel the presence of it, and my involvement with it when I drove it.\u00c2\u00a0But after awhile the restless identifying with it, and the investigating process had concluded.\u00c2\u00a0There was little left to the imagination.\u00c2\u00a0In a short time I was once again ultimately faced with ‘what is<\/em>‘, and the urge to move away from it.<\/p>\n

David<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I wanted to observe my internal processes during different desires, and also during incidents of avoidance.\u00c2\u00a0Among other things, I observed the desire for an iPod, the hunger for lunch, the avoidance of anger and not wanting to display it, desire … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":34,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1,30,79],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-961","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-01_general","category-tsk-online-fall-2008winter-2009","category-arising"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/961","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/34"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=961"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/961\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=961"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=961"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cciforum.dreamhosters.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=961"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}