Observing the way situations seem to present themselves, I noticed the either/or and this or that nature of how I assessed what was happening. The polarities seemed to jump out at me; to do something or not, based on judgments of pleasing or not. For instance, to go to the coffee shop to write my practice notes, or do them at home and be distracted by those who would distract. :-)
Seems like a silly example, but my life is made of such choices, this or that. In the supplemental reading it said, “Gathering and implementing knowledge could be understood as the fundamental human activity.†KTS p. 259
The gathering of knowledge involves choices between this and that, and between me or it/you, and now and then. But when I look at my polar example I see the self limiting nature of its own parameters; of course there are other choices that I didn’t consider, or simply ruled out because they didn’t fit within my own limited cost/benefit analysis. And it’s interesting how I did my this or that judgment projecting out through linear time to an imagined, future cost/benefit. I’m not saying that planning doesn’t have a place in my life, but being aware how I ‘self-limit’ through polarity definitely opens to more possibilities (more open-minded), but also seems to point to openness itself.
This morning as I was waking up there were some moments when I was aware of dream meanings dissolving; not meaning what they meant in the dream and not meaning what they would in a normal awake state. It was as if they could mean anything, even opposites at the same time, where yes and no could mean the same thing at the same time. This preverbal awareness lasted only a few moments before my normal orientation took over. This preverbal awareness may be the deeper sense of no distance TSK Ex. 17 talks about.
Regarding this preverbal awareness, a few paragraphs down from the above quote there was this: “…from a certain perspective it seems more accurate to say that mind is simply a pattern of recognition and understanding, the product of a specific history and the expression of a particular knowledge.†In light of that twilight zone between the dream state and the waking state, I had a very clear sense of knowingness within which patterns arise, a glowing awareness if you will. It wasn’t an empty awareness, it was quite full, but it was not confined to the narrow ‘train’ of meaning it was leaving and the narrow ‘train’ of meaning it would be getting on. It seemed quite vast (at the very least more allowing).
David
