To penetrate and eliminate subtle and persistent afflictions, it is necessary to take clarity beyond the level of possession so that it becomes indestructible.Â
Revelations of Mind, Tarthang Tulku
If any exercise could be said to be a gateway to a universe of possibilities, this would be my nomination. What a journey I have travelled with this in the last fortnight!
First I struggled to construct intricate inner networks of light. The little five-light mandalas would move; some refusing to budge from a few inches away from the body, others much more flexible, others insisting on dropping down into my crown and continuing to build within the body.
Proceeding sequentially and in a linear fashion, trying to hold the current point in balance with seeing the whole surrounding, expanding structure, until the inner tension built to such a level and my patience and capacity began to crack at the edges.
I noticed that this was somewhat comparable to building a multi-headed, 12-armed ‘deity’; holding a different implement in each hand – but perhaps even more challenging!
The more I practised, the more it seemed to throw into relief darkness, conflict, ambivalence, inner preoccupations.
Sometimes the lights were diamond sharp and sometimes more like milk or a muffled lighthouse beam in fog.
Moving to Ex 32B, I found the instruction to allow the ‘lights’ to be ‘more subtle’, and to be ‘emerging naturally from the openness of space’ to be key.
The combined effect of the hint: This light is not an imagined physical brightness, but rather the dynamism of ‘time’ and the incisive clarity of ‘knowingness’, with the suggestion that the best way to proceed is by ‘appreciatively apprehending’ switched the exercise to an entirely new level. The very words ‘dynamism of time’ and ‘incisive clarity of knowingness’ allowed what they were describing to be revealed.
O son of noble family…listen. Now the pure luminosity of the dharmatÄ is shining before you; recognise it.O son of noble family, at this moment your state of mind is by nature pure emptiness, it does not possess any nature whatever, neither substance nor quality such as colour, but it is pure emptiness; …But this state of mind is not just blank emptiness, it is unobstructed, sparkling, pure and vibrant…your mind whose nature is emptiness without any substance whatever, and your mind which is vibrant and luminous are inseparable…This mind of yours is inseparable luminosity and emptiness in a form of a great mass of light, it has no birth or death, therefore it is the Buddha of Immortal Light…’
 The Great Liberation through Hearing in the Bardo,Â
Translated by Francesca Fremantle and Chögyam Trungpa
 Light seems to be a quality of space; seems to be enfolded in Space. When I allow these instructions (not ‘doing’ or ‘imposing’), then light ‘pops out’ of space spontaneously.
It is as though this ‘lighting up time’ is already happening (hence the encouragement to appreciatively apprehend that); knowledge manifesting in a time which is not normally observed. When we engage Ex 32, we show up to witness, participate in and embody this.